Grammy for Granny
I am pretty sure that I just aged a full century. I have never felt as pathetically old and ‘so last year’ as I did after all the Grammy award chaos. It is pretty clear to me that I am not a teen anymore when I watch the little stars rise from their cradles, but this took me to a whole new level of ancient.
Bieber makes me proud. Yeah, I admit I am a bit jealous of a lilliputian idol catching the eyes of young and old alike, but he did well. It’s sad for him to be required to lose his childhood, but I am sure he will be fine. That is the only part that saddens me with these young famous kids. As healthy humans, we only have a small percentage of our lives as adolescence. After that, we have a very large percentage of our lives being adults. Who would want to give up the small part that we can never get back. Well, for money and fame, I probably couldn’t agree more. I would too. With the hair just calling out to be tousled and the tiny adorable voice, who can disapprove. He makes me smile.
But then, they happened and I almost cried. Well, first came the horror and disbelief. From the nude body suits to the leopard prints to the bushes sprouting from heads… all the way until the woman hatching from an egg. WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY THINKING? Don’t get me wrong, I am all for individuality. However, this was unimaginable. Were they for real? And they all seemed to have been so proud of their looks, each trying to outdo the next in absurdity and nudity. People were acting like it was all completely sane.
I could not seem to find any respect that I used to have for the celebrities of our time. In the past, actors, actresses, and singers would intrigue me. I would be mesmerized by their work. I admired their character. Now, I had to turn away to keep myself from vomiting. I felt like shouting, “Get some clothes on so I can hear what you are saying.” Or, “Take that thing off of your head, or cover your thing, so that I can focus.”
Majority of their songs consist of the same things now. Sex, naked women, moaning sounds, profanity, and a repetition of words, or what they claim to be words. I am relieved that Lady Antebellum got five awards and record and song of the year. Had it been one of the others, I probably would have cried about the world that had crashed in front of my eyes. Majority of their lives consist of the same things too. Drugs, stealing, jail, rehab, public marriage, cheating, divorce, private marriage, babies, affairs, adoption, divorce, flings, drugs, overdose, rehabs, clothing line, perfume line, friends, enemies, and paparazzi. Don’t they get bored? Doesn’t seem so. Everyone is shocked every time.
It’s the end of the world as we know it…. I don’t feel fine…