I’m Afraid He’s Mine…
You know that kid in the park that intentionally knocks over every other one. The one that hogs the slides and goes up the wrong way.The one that throws rocks to greet the latest slider. The one that pulls the little girls’ pigtails. The one that jumps in the middle of every ball game and grabs the ball. The one that pulls a kid’s cap off so that he can yank his little hairs. The one that, without notice and without provocation, slaps a kid across the face and then trips him. The one that sits in the corner crushing the ants or any helpless little creatures.
When you sit outside the park watching the child who you find to be a perfect childlike villain. A toddler aspiring to be a Mr. Gru. You wonder what kind of parents he has and if perhaps he is abused at home. You wonder if he is beaten or watches others getting hurt. You wonder if maybe he watches too many movies and sits in front of a TV all day viewing shows that are inappropriate for his age.
You think terrible thoughts and curse out the boy. You thank G-d you never mothered or fathered a child like that. You are relieved that you must be a better mother or father because your children would never behave the same. Because you have succeeded in raising angels. Suddenly, you are full of yourself and proud. You maybe even walk away having a better day that day.
I am a good mom and we don’t even own a TV. The boys watch several times a year and it’s usually the same Dora Saves the Snow Princess . I think I do an amazing job raising my children, and I am sure that I do the best that I can each and every day. Sometimes my children are angels, and sometimes they misbehave. But, I always love them.
Growing up is not easy and emotionally very hard to deal with at times. It is hard to remember what childhood was like being within those tiny, little bodies. It is difficult to recall the daily struggles of being so dependent and wanting to be free and big like everyone else. Why they hurt other kids is hard to know. We don’t always understand why they do things and this is only the beginning. It becomes easier to see the parts of children that we don’t understand when they hit their teens. As of now though, we have to do the best that we can.
That little bully in the yard. The one that even I am at fault for cursing out in the past. Well, he has a great mom and dad. He has everything he needs and is well-fed, bathed, embraced, and adored. He is disciplined and Never beaten and is always loved.
I am sorry for any bruises he causes or any tugs in the hair.
Because that kid in the park, I am afraid he is mine.