Smitten With Laziness
I am not sure how this happened, but I have been plagued by the laziness epidemic. It is possible that it’s because we have computers and now the world is at our fingertips. I assume that is the cause.
I wake up and dash to the bathroom. (Probably the most I move in a day) Sadly, I must lift my lazy butt, although I am awaiting for the arrival of a bathroom app or something of the sort. I grab a quick microwave meal from within one of the bags of delivered groceries which were ordered online. Seconds later, voila, a full nutritious meal. I sit by the computer and read through my emails and pay my outstanding bills. I order some pizza for lunch and chat up a few friends. I put my feet up and watch the latest TV show episodes and check out the current news.
As I am sitting there, I realize that the kids need to be picked up, so I instant message the hubs to his cell phone to go and get them. I then remember that I am still waiting for the blood test results and so I check them up online. I need a prescription filled and take care of that in the online drugstore. Some pictures that I shot need some sorting through and developing, I make an order.
I can really use a piece of jewelry and so I Google the best and cheapest stores. Not cheap, but Swarovski definitely carries the sparkles. I, like my son, have a deep affection for the dazzle and shimmer. I can’t figure out how big the stone pendant is on the necklace I want and I am too lazy to get the phone to call and ask. It’s okay, the website was prepared for people like me. I chatted with the online assistant and chose a necklace to match my new Stonhenge earrings and was still debating the other one. I can’t figure out if it will be dressy enough to pair up with real diamond earrings. Still to be decided.
I get to have a video chat with overseas family members and then it is back to work. Time to write my blog. After Googling about stool consistencies to make sure that my kids’ stools are normal, I realize that I hardly moved my bum all day. No wonder why my underwear hardly fit and my cheeks keep peeking through. This is the reason why they invented thongs. I have finally discovered the answer to the ancient puzzling question. Enough about the bottom.
The kids are soon to come home and if they even sense that I used the word butt, I will hear it chanted over the next 24 hours without even a pause. So we will refrain from its usage. I try to decide between ordering pizza online or budgeting and lifting my heavy form from the bed to cook dinner. So I sort through some food ideas online adding the word “amazing” before everything for the most used and highest rated recipes. Oh how I wish I can order a chef right about now.
A movie is loaded for the kids to join me in my lackadaisical, dilatory state.
I should order one of THESE.
I have to search some exercises to be done in lying position so that I can keep my blood flowing freely.
I can’t make it stop. Ahhh… This laziness is soothing and comfortable.
Why would I move my haunches if everything that I need is right here in front of me?
(derrière word choice was altered for irritating banter prevention)