The CliffHanger and Its Early Demise

The TV shows’ seasons have all been drawing to a close over the past week and  I have noticed that the  finales have changed dramatically over the years. Lots of shows, that I have been watching over the past five years, have become soporific and hardly mediocre, although still keeping me riveted to the screen. They have just become my family and I need to see their lives concluding in some form or other. I am captivated by them no matter how hard I try to tear my face away.

I remember the good old days when I closed my eyes through Prison Break. I was actually gripping my blanket and digging my nails into my palms praying it would end safely. In each episode there were moments where my hands were covering my ears so that I wouldn’t  hear the music that skillfully heightened my fear levels to unbearable capacities. The gut wrenching, heart stopping, and deep resonating sounds. I am cringing thinking about the scenes I could hardly sit through. At a certain point I just couldn’t watch any longer and stopped. I needed to wait until the season completed to see the rest, so that I wouldn’t be left a week or two anxiously awaiting the next episode at the edge of my chair. You can’t live like that. It is constant worry.

Then, the writers got soft. They lost their touch. The shows no longer startle the viewers and rarely elicit emotions of fear or even wonder. I am sure I have not been desensitized because you can never get me to watch a horror movie. I would actually pee my pants. But now, I know pretty much what is going to happen in each show and there are no surprises. I don’t need to be freaking out constantly, but there needs to be something other than routine to get me to watch these upcoming seasons. I’m not saying that I need a show like Lost. That was insane and I couldn’t make it past the first couple of seasons. It was just all over the place and bizarre. It should have been categorized as a horror.

The season finales no longer have me dreaming up what will be next when the next one commences. I used to feel as though my heart dropped from my chest when the show ended. They had someone die, or about to die, or thinking of dying, or lying in the bathtub full of the blood that oozed from their wrist. Now EVERY SINGLE SHOW ended the same. Everyone was happily ever after and they threw in a little twist that made me think NOTHING AT ALL. But the biggest cliffhanger ending that they could come up with, was identical in each episode; pregnancy. The “Oh my G-d, I am pregnant”, or the flash of the pregnancy test, or the wait for it,

“I have something to tell you”
“Yeah, so do I”
“Okay, you go first”
“Fine, I think we should break up, things just aren’t working”
Hurt expression and slowly walking away
“Wait, but what were you going to say?”
“I’m pregnant”
Complete shock and horror on his face
“What? How?” (Uh gee, I don’t know. That is the most common side effect of unprotected sex, you moron.)

Oh, and let’s not forget the “I am pregnant, let’s get back together. Oh whoops, blood test results came back, I guess I never was. Let’s break up.” Don’t you want to return next season to see how that one resolved? Um, no. No thanks.

But once again, the vicious cycle repeats itself against my better judgment. I am back, better than ever, hoping the season will pick up somehow. One Tree Hill, so over. It was, and it happened a long, long time ago. And what do you know, Barren Brooke Davis is pregnant. Grey’s Anatomy, how long must they drag it out before I puke or before someone else sleeps with someone else who sleeps with someone else. Or, it has gotten a bit better since then, and now everyone seems clueless as to who has feelings for them and is actually drooling at their feet. They should make the show normal and stable to, perhaps, maintain interest in the season’s return because even that, would shake things up a bit. Gossip Girl, really? Blair Waldorf pregnant? Oh gee, who didn’t see that coming.

What happened to people using birth control. Do they all think that they can pop into bed and out again (or on the table or desk…whatever tickles their fancies) and not be pregnant. Who doesn’t use birth control aside from the teens on 16 and Pregnant. The human brain is shrinking more and more as the years progress. Even the characters in the shows are following suit.

90210 (gasp!) I know, which adult watches that show anyways? Well, desperate times called for desperate measures. I have extra time to relax and eat breakfast alone and it is not enough time to watch a movie. I have watched all of the shows that I would care for and I am usually up-to-date. I had nothing else. (promise!) Well, Adrianna Tate-Duncan was standing on the edge of a cliff and she was about to jump to her death for all the villainous things she had done. I was so excited that someone would finally do a real CLIFFhanger so that I could speculate for a month, or so, whether she had died or someone caught her at the end. I could have pondered the upcoming season of whether it would begin with a funeral that was real or just a thought that quickly raced through her mind as she attempted to jump. But, no. Not so lucky. Little Miss Evil stepped back and said she will attempt to do better and be a better person. ARGH! No style. None whatsoever.

I think the cliffhanger idea has just transformed into something else. People should be cautioned.

WARNING: Viewer discretion is advised. Season finale is not suitable for any audience. Episode may lead to a certain death. It may create a CliffHanger; Demise due to cliff jumping, or hanging, or combination of both. On another note, pregnancy is the most common side effect that occurs in 80% of cases of unprotected sex. Be responsible and use methods of birth control or use abstinence.

Consider yourselves warned.

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Posted on May 19, 2011, in My Daily Blogs and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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