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Verbal Diarrhea

I have recently been accused of Verbal Diarrhea by one of my readers and I found it quite amusing. Being that I did a lot of schooling in medical terminology, the word Diarrhea should probably be a lot easier for me to use because it is, simply put, just a condition. However, since way back as far as I can remember, that word has been one of the most difficult for me to say and even to hear.

When I was a little girl complaining of a stomach ache and silently wishing to cut school, my dad would just blatantly pop the question; “Do you have diarrhea?” Every time, without fail, the burning scarlet embarrassment creeped up my neck and across my cheeks and I ran from the room. He did it so often you would think I grew accustomed to the word. But that day never came. Read the rest of this entry

I’m Afraid He’s Mine…

You know that kid in the park that intentionally knocks over every other one. The one that hogs the slides and goes up the wrong way.The one that throws rocks to greet the latest slider.  The one that pulls the little girls’ pigtails. The one that jumps in the middle of every ball game and grabs the ball. The one that pulls a kid’s cap off so that he can yank his little hairs. The one that, without notice and without provocation, slaps a kid across the face and then trips him. The one that sits in the corner crushing the ants or any helpless little creatures. Read the rest of this entry

Grammy for Granny

I am pretty sure that I just aged a full century. I have never felt as pathetically old and ‘so last year’ as I did after all the Grammy award chaos. It is pretty clear to me that I am not a teen anymore when I watch the little stars rise from their cradles, but this took me to a whole new level of ancient.

Bieber makes me proud. Yeah, I admit I am a bit jealous of a lilliputian idol catching the eyes of young and old alike, but he did well. It’s sad for him to be required to lose his childhood, but I am sure he will be fine. That is the only part that saddens me with these young famous kids. As healthy humans, we only have a small percentage of our lives as adolescence. After that, we have a very large percentage of our lives being adults. Who would want to give up the small part that we can never get back. Well, for money and fame, I probably couldn’t agree more. I would too. With the hair just calling out to be tousled and the tiny adorable voice, who can disapprove. He makes me smile.

But then, they happened and I almost cried. Well, first came the horror and disbelief. From the nude body suits to the leopard prints to the bushes sprouting from heads… all the way until the woman hatching from an egg. Read the rest of this entry