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Her Morbid Mosaic Mystique

I have never met anyone in my life that was more complex and more pessimistic than she was. She had always boggled my mind. Unlike the game of Boggle, no matter how hard I shook her, those obnoxiously loud little cubes did not settle into actual words. Whichever way you turned her, the sequence of letters did not clarify a thing. The words that came from her mouth, or pen, were always far beyond my comprehension. They never fell into their plastic square grid forming logical explanatory words, the dice just tumbled into a muddling mayhem.

She grew up in a loving home and seemed to have passed through all the proper and common channels into adolescence. She was stubborn, unfaltering, and highly motivated. She constantly aimed for perfection. She seemed to a be a typical teenager and average student, everything appeared to be ordinary from a distance. However, from nearby, not so much.

She spoke in riddles, confusing even herself, at times. Her writings were unusually bitter and unhappy, unnaturally gruesome and brooding. There were many mentions of death and darkness and quite an impressive vocabulary, that till this day, I can not make sense of. Behind every word of her poems were strings of meanings and alternate ways of understanding each phrase, even Shakespeare would have been impressed. Read the rest of this entry

To Battle With the Fickle

“What in heaven’s name is wrong with you? Are you really that stupid? You sound so ignorant. I don’t even know why I am talking to you. You are a waste of time.” I am pretty sure that is what people hear when I talk to them. I am a screamer and I am terribly high-strung. I am so opinionated and will not budge from my ideas, that it bothers me sometimes. As a wise man, Shakespeare, once said, “Such as we are made of, such we be.” Anyhow, who is judging, right? They are. They all are.

I used to be pretty content with my arguments. It’s how I got through my days. I am a debater and I love information. However, lately it has gone downhill. I had several people who I enjoyed talking to and verbally fighting with. I guess they were belligerent and conceited like me. But they are no longer part of my life and I am deeply saddened by that. Where have all the fervent strong-minded people gone? We are left with hoards of fickle. They are in fact a fickle group of people, easily swayed by whoever is speaking.

People are no longer forming opinions from facts. The beliefs now consist of what people think should be thought. Now that doesn’t really help me when all I want to do is create a dispute and controversy. Sounds pretty sad, perhaps, but it keeps me on my toes. I learn new information from every argument. New ideas are revealed to me. I develop further assumptions.

Nowadays, debates consists of two phenomenons. Read the rest of this entry